Monday, January 10, 2011

Facing Illness

I debated writing this post. I really am feeling down and discouraged, but I realized that this is the reality of where I am right now and I need to share it. I have had many requests for a new blog post. You just may regret that now! : ) 

I am sick and in the hospital again. I have very low kidney function, anemia, and congestive heart failure. 

I know, your reactions will range from "Oh no, poor Rachel," and "Oh no, not another drama." I don't blame anyone for having those thoughts, however, please do not pity me.

Right now I am living my life just as the doctors have suggested.

  • Watching what I eat.
  • Taking copious amounts of medications.
  • Physical therapy.
  • Attending so many doctor's appointments, they are becoming my friends.
Edith is the reason I am here. I gave away my power and control for so many years that I am now suffering the consequences. I ask myself the question that I am sure you are wondering, "Was being in 'control' worth it?" It wasn't. I know that we are not supposed to live with regrets, because our pasts shape who we are today. I will tell you this, I regret the choices I made, and if I could go back I would do it totally differently. Of course, that is only if I had the knowledge I have today.

I plead with you, that if you are using an eating disorder to cope with issues in your life, please seek treatment TODAY.

Blessings to you today, and please say a prayer for me. I pray for my readers every time I post. 

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