Saturday, February 12, 2011

Change of Plans

To A Mouse
The best laid schemes o' Mice an' Men,
Gang aft agley,
An' lea'e us nought but grief an' pain,
For promis'd joy! 
The best laid schemes of Mice and Men
oft go awry,
And leave us nothing but grief and pain,
For promised joy!
Robert Burns, (Poem, November, 1785)
Scottish national poet (1759 - 1796) 
Today I thought about this poem and what it means. I am a planner. I like things to go my way and get frustrated when they don't. I often think that I know best and that others just can;'t do "it" as good as I can.
I learned a lesson today, I don't always know best! A hard lesson to learn. I am in the hospital and although I thought it was time for me to go home, and some of the doctors agreed with me, it just takes one to say "nope." I guess ultimately it was a good decision as I am in quite a bit of pain after I had surgery. 
Putting my health and ultimately my life in the hands of others is hard for me. Letting go is often frightening. We, as a society, are conditioned to be independent and to take care of ourselves. If we let someone else make those decisions we feel we are considered weak. We want others to know we can handle things on our own. To show them our independence. 
As I have posted before, I now believe that true strength and courage come from acknowledging the fact that we can't do it all. That we need help and support. 
I have heard it said that if you want to make God laugh, then just make plans. His plans for us and our lives may not make sense to us, but He knows what He is doing. I am working on surrendering control and letting God take the lead. I have found in the past that although it is not the easy way, that looking back on those situations, it makes sense. 
Truly, "The best laid plans of mice and men, oft go awry." So, take some advice from a recovering "control freak," and let go!

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